In the churches I have spent most of my life in, this was the unwritten code of conduct for good, virgin Christian girls:
1) Don't talk to boys
2) Don't look at boys
3) In fact, don't talk to anyone who isn't a family member or someone you've known since kindergarten. Just sit by yourself looking as bored and miserable as possible.
I thought that if I wanted a wife that was sexually pure, then I would have to marry one of these self-righteous zombies (Great..).
Fortunately, I went off to college and met young Christian women who were wise, caring, and really fun to hang out with. When I read Ellen Burkhardt's article, "When Guys Find Out I'm A Virgin", she reminded me a lot of these God-fearing, totally awesome ladies. On top of that, her article confirmed a little-known fact about Christian women:
THEY ARE INTERESTED IN SEX, TOO!!!!
The stereotype about Christian women is that they have no knowledge of, interest in, or desire for sex whatsoever and that they only do it if:
1) A heartless, worldly boyfriend bullies or tricks them into it, or
2) They want create the next generation of self-righteous zombies with an equally rigid and dogmatic husband. (Missionary position only, of course...)
The reality is that most Christian women find men attractive and also look forward to sexual intimacy in marriage. While they are more interested in the emotional/relational aspect of sex, they do enjoy the physical acrobatics of it as well. For this reason, it's hard for Christian women to wait until marriage, too. That's why I've started praying that Ellen stays strong in her quest to save herself for her husband.
On top of this, her article inspired me to continue my quest to save myself for my wife. After all, as a future husband, I have the responsibility of leading my future family, and the best way to do that is by example. So if I expect my future wife to be a virgin, and want my future kids to stay pure for their spouses, I have to do it first.
Check out Ellen's awesome virginity testimony at the link below:
http://www.salon.com/2014/10/06/when_guys_find_out_im_a_virgin/
